Our New Patio.

Boxing Day at Cardiff Bay.

You know, the local council always try their best to please. Every November they run a wonderful firework display nearby. August brings the Big Cheese Festival to the town. Now we have the Big Balloon Festival in Blackwood, just up the valley. Here's a video of the event.

Spent the Summer holiday on the tiny island of Sark.
It's just off the French coast, one of the Channel Islands.
Strange place..it has its own laws. In fact, the whole place is governed by a feudal lord.
Here's a picture of the seat of government.

Big day in Wales. All over the land a smoking ban has come into place. Pubs, restaurants, cafes, even railways station platforms. I'm absolutely delighted about it. I've suffered too many years of trying to enjoy myself in smoke filled places, going home stinking.
Now I'll watch all of those inconsiderate people hanging around their streets and nicotoriums freezing.....and I'll laugh and laugh and laugh.

One of my school children built this fantastic Wassail bowl for me last year. This year, another one glazed it.
I should take it out to my garden on Christmas Eve and Wassail my pear tree with a good dose of cider.
It has been invited to a joint Wassail / Mari Llwyd evening at Chepstow next January. Until then, it makes a wonderful Christmas decoration, and causes no problems regarding global warming.

Now, when I was a student, I had a favourite band, and my favourite singer was the singer in my favourite band, and the band was called Steeleye Span and the singer was Maddy Prior. Anyway, I always thought that she was wonderful and I had her picture on my wall and everything.
So there I was, Friday night, playing for Cardiff Morris in Cardiff when somebody sidled up to me and whispered in my ear, "Don't they dance well. Isn't it nice to see so many young dancers." and I looked around, and guess who it was? Maddy Prior !
I was all of a dither the rest of the night and hardly played a good note....but I didn't care.

Yesterday at School

Yesterday at school. Here I am......on the right. You know, it's one of those jobs where no two days are the same.

My attempt at wildlife photography. He's only about 5 mm wide :O)

Rhia's portrait of Dr W.G. Grace

I'm really getting to grips with my shed. Most recent addition is my new tool rack. Good hey?

So, there I am, just returned from another day at the Chalk Face, feeling worn out and tired after another struggle with sense and sensibility, when I look outside to my garden. Lo and behold, without any warning or so much as a bye your leave, the Beeb have gone and plonked some of their lighting kit in my garden. They're filming an episode from a new drama called "Torchwood." It's an offshoot from Dr. Who.
Now, if I'd only known, forty odd years ago that the Dr. Who guys would be setting up their kit in my garden, I would have skyrocketed up the coolometer in my classroom.
Apparently they were trying to create a different sort of atmosphere in the pub next door. Well, it'll take more than a light to do that, believe me. So I get a bit stroppy with them and tell them where to put their light, but then thought the better of it. You can't mess with the Time Lords after all.

Saw her at the Chepstow Two Rivers festival. A brilliant day.

Poser.

Pointless inventions of the new century.

Spotted today. A car with hub caps that turned independently of the wheel. They just sort of spin on a bearing..........thus, as the car is moving, the hubs appear to be moving at a different speed giving the sort of effect that you used to spot on waggon wheels in the old cowboy films. Also, when the car stopped at lights, the hubcaps continued moving forward.....then stopped.....then started turning backwards.

I'll add this to my ever growing list of pointless inventions of the new century....right next to the car wash that had white, green, pink and blue suds that smell of bubblegum.

Here's an oddity. It's an infra red photograph of the old coal tip at Llanwono. I used to look out at it every day as a child. It dominated the view from the back windows in both of the houses where I lived as a child. After the disaster at Aberfan, all tips like this were taken down. Strangely, although I didn't know it at the time, but Tom Fletcher:- Squire of Cardiff Morris was involved in taking the tip away.

He presented me with this photograph just before practice one night.

Thanks Tom.

It has arrived.
Looks gorgeous and sounds powerful and strong.

:O)
In a world where you can buy a microwave oven for £25 isn't it nice to come across something so beautifully hand-crafted.

This is waht has become of my life. I live in a world of spectacles.
Last week, I got a pair of varifocal lenses....bottom right .....and as a result, I've lived in a fog for a whole week. You know that technique that they use on the T.V. where they fade from one image into another? Well my world has been like that all week.....Oh, and going to the toilet is a nightmare, but only for some functions.

Went to visit my new baby today. I'm having a new concertina built by Marcus Butler over in Newport. Yes, I know that there isn't much to see yet. I've been told that it should be ready in about 3 weeks.

My friend works as a sub-editor at the Western Mail newspaper. Besides setting out the newspaper so that it looks nice, he's supposed to check for errors; spellings, punctuation etc, also to make sure that everything makes sense.
Missed this one though....published last week on the obituaries page.

It was Christmas eve and I was nine years old (about). I'd been in trouble the year before because my brother had persuaded me to wake my parents up at some un-godly hour. So, I came up with a plan. I left a note for Santa sking for my Dalek book to be left at the bottom of the bed. That way, I'd have something to read whilst waiting for my parents to stir.
You know.........he's a good chap is Santa. He did exactly as I suggested. Sadly, I'd finished the book by 6 a.m. and still had ages to wait.
My best friend Vimal had an unpleasant job the other day. He had to help clear his mother-in-law's house....she'd died a few days earlier.
He came across this book. When he showed it to me, it brought so many memories back.
I'm going to scan some of the pages for school. I wonder whether they'll appeal to a new generation?

Bought a new shirt today. It's one of those Grandad style shirts without a collar, like the ones my own grandfather wore.
I was amazed to see the label....took me back to my own childhood when you'd see 'Empire Made' on so many products.

9 Ladies Dancing? Cardiff Ladies Morris at Dinas Powis Christmas Fayre.

I have joined the realm of fools. A few months ago a complete stranger heard me playing the melodeon. He suggested that I joined a Morris side....so I did....well, actually two sides. I now play for Cardiff Morris (here:- a mixed side) and for Cardiff Ladies Morris....a ladies side with male musicians.
My heart is full of joy! Haven't had so much fun in years.

Received this yesterday. It's the front cover of my book.....which is due out in January. First time ever to see my name on the front cover of a real paper book. I've had stuff published on the internet and inside magazines, but this one is all my own work, except for Sue Rundle's wonderful illustrations.

I had a hernia scare a few weeks ago, and today was the day of my hospital appointment:- 2.30 with a doctor...I think the name was Sarawakand...or something like that. Well, it was a name that conjoured up an image of an elderly Indina doctor, probably with a turban.
I was shown into a consulting room. As I sat there, alone, I noticed a pair of surgical gloves and a tube of KY jelly on the table. My toes started to curl. Then in walked the doctor.
Well, she was about 26 years old, had long blond hair, deep blue eyes and a smile. She was in all ways possible, gorgeous.
After a few initial questians, came the imortal words, "Drop your trousers then, lets have a feel! Oh, I'll just get a chaperone." So there I am, with my trousers half way down my legs when back she comes with another nurse....do you remember Nurse Ratchet from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest? Well, she must live near here now.
So there I am, lying on my back as she starts feeling me with a very probing, poking around sort of finger as I lie back and think of England. Good job I had clean underware on. Then she asks me, "Are there any lumps on your testicles?" "How romantic," thought I. So, she starts treating them like coconuts in a sack as the sweat starts to pour from my brow. Eventually, its all over and she tells me to dress.
"Do you smoke?" she asks.
"No," I answer.
"Drink?"
"Are you asking me out?" I reply, "Only, we've only just met." I reply.

Anyway, thankfully, it turns out that there's nothing wrong with me, although I can now understand why some people develop Munchausen's syndrome.

I need some help here. I just ordered this pair of trousers from an excellent on-line catalogue. I was delighted to discover a company that actually held my correct measurements....well, they actually alter the trousers to your size after you order them. Thing is though, they come with this strange button hole thingy. It buttons to a button that's sort of in the region of your upper-groin / appendix area. I have no idea what it is for. I phoned the company for advice, but the lady on the help desk said she'd find out. She phoned back later when I was out and Sue, my wife took the call. When I got home she told me that it was for 'male modesty', which confused me even more. At the moment, I'm guessing that it's something for blokes with piercings. Whatever....can anybody release me from my state of conundrum?

I found this old photograph. About ten years ago, my Dad said that he'd never ever had a birthday cake. Well, we had to put that right didn't we? We had one made in the shape of a photograph album, with all of the memories that were important to him, in his R.A.F. uniform, as a grocer and as a grandfather. He really loved that cake.

So there I was, lining up for a photograph of these Morris dancers....when the girl at the front starts waving her hankies frantically at me......then I realised that I knew her. Her name's Aisling and she plays bagpipes.

My letter got published in this month's issue of Ethical Consumer.
What do you think hey?

I've won a trophy!

I was invited to take part in a radio show called "Genius" staring Dave Gorman. Six of us had to pitch ideas of genius to Dave and his guest , John Fortune. There were all sort of ideas:- a glove that left handed people wore to convert their left hand into a right hand, using laughing gas at riots rather than tear gas, and even having an official "You're Dumped Day" a few days after Valentine's day. Some of the ideas, like Turbo Golf and an artificial brake pedal for cars fell by the wayside. In the end, my idea for sending old age pensioners on the first manned mission to Mars..(I wrote about it on one of my first Xanga Blog entries)...to save the cost of the return trip, was declared to be Pure Genius and I was awarded this trophy. Still, you might like to take a look at this picture to get an idea of the true quality of my genius.
One other thing. John Fortune actually wrote one of my favourite books of all time:- A Melon is for Extasy. I particularly liked Chapter 5 featuring the Germoline ointment and the tweezers.

I'm not very good at art....never have been. I'm rather proud of this though. It's done in potato print. This was an example that I made to show the children.

Whistling gnome that frightens away the cats. If anything, they simply leave a bigger pile.

These hands belong to a young lady called Becky Taylor. I think she also owns the chanter, regulators and drones that you can see here. She's just amazing.

Just saw this on Ebay. Just couldn't resist it. You won't believe this....HE WHISTLES. Not just any old whistle either....he's got a super-sonic high pitched whistel that frightens away the cats and stops them cr%^&ing in my lawn. Can't wait for the postman to deliver him. I wonder whether he'll be whistling in the postman's van?

My new monitor. I spotted it in the boot of the bloke in front of me whilst queueing at the local corporation rubbish skips last Sunday. "Does that work?" says I. "Yes," says he, "Do you want it?" "Yes please, " replies I with a chirpy giggle, thinking of the nasty green patch on the display of my own monitor. So, I bring it home, plug it in, turn it on and suddenly, I'm the proud owner of an IIYAMA Vision Master Pro19....FOR FREE.
Going back to the skips this weekend. Looking out for a nice flat screen TV.

You know the movie Apollo13, where Tom Hanks and the other guys suddenly find out that their carbon dioxide level is steadily rising and they're all doomed? Then all the scientific guys back on Earth come up with a plan where they take some tape and some book covers and build a carbon dioxide scrubber that takes all of the carbon dioxide out of their air? Well, why doesn't NASA sell little carbon dioxide doodads so we can all scrub our little bit of atmosphere and save the earth from global warming?
Would that work?

Started my jury service today. Looks like I might get into court tomorrow. This is my Rumpole card, showing that I have official access to the Rumpole Diner and can get up to £5.40 in food and drink every day. Strangely though, if I don't use my £5.40 on one day, I can't carry it over to the next day.

Took a family trip to the Millennium Centre today.
Here's a photograph, using a wide angle lens....three photographs stitched together.

Birthday gifts.

My concertina. Neglected for years, but thankfully, out of the case again. I believe that it was made in South Africa. Don't know much else about it except that it's a 40 button Anglo concertina. Consequently, it has an awful lot of wrong notes. Currently working on a lovely tune called "Lord Franklin" which I've posted on my music website

Never, ever thought that I'd write this. You wouldn't either had you seen my school results in English.
This was taken on the day of the launch of my first novel, "Uncle Arthur's Barbecue". It was commissioned by the Food Standards Agency. It tells the story of a young lad's uncle and how he almost poisons the entire neighbourhood with a couple of pounds of dodgy sausages.
It's a free resource for schools available from:-
http://www.ngfl-cymru.org.uk/vtc/ngfl/fsa/index.html

The photograph shows Joy Whinney, the Director of FSA Wales, Sue Rundle-Hughes, my illustrator, and me.

I took this photograph in our school yard today, using a simple pinhole camera. I had to develop it myself in my classroom cupboard. I've never had to do this before. As I had to do it on my own in almost total darkness, I had one of the children outside the door shouting instructions through the wood.
That's my car just on top of the third cone.
I'm actually rather proud of my efforts.

Amazing. What's left to say?
Wales 32 - 20 Ireland
Grand Slam, Championship and Triple Crown...all in one day.

What a strange week. I was sent on a course. I usually look forward to such events...nice break from school. I wasn't looking forward to this one though. It was on something called, "The School Assistance Program," and was presented by a lady called Cheryl Watkins, from Arizona. Basically, it's an idea that she has put together to try to help the troubled souls that we have to work with at school. It's a bit like an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting without the booze.
Well......within the hour, as we were all invited to bare our souls, tears flooded like rain and the air was white with Kleenex. By lunchtime, all 16 of us felt thoroughly drained. This went on for three days. Towards the end of day three, we were given a rather interesting exercise. We had to try to think of somebody who had really hurt us in the past, but we had to try to put our side of the hurt to one side and write a letter of apology to the person in order to try to clear our own grief.
I spent quite some time before I could think of anybody, then I came up with this:-

Today, for my own well-being, I choose to forgive Margaret Thatcher, but I only choose to forgive her for the introduction of the National Curriculum. This one political decision had a profound and disturbing effect on my own personal happiness, stress level and family harmony. I am however prepared to accept the fact that ultimately, this was for the good as I have seen a great many children benefit from its introduction.

Sadly though, I am not prepared to forgive you for the Miners' Strike, the Falklands War, sending old Tom Davies down the road to prison for not paying his Poll Tax or for taking the free milk from schoolchildren. Neither can I forgive you for having such an annoying, irritating voice.

Yours,
Phil

Then, joy of joys, as our next exercise, I thought we were told to write an imaginary letter, wher we had to write out the sort of response that we would have got from the first letter. I actually got this part of the task all wrong, but what the hell, I really enjoyed writing it anyway.

Dear Phil,
I am so sorry to hear that you have bore these grudges against me for so long. I was delighted to hear though that you've finally come to your senses regarding the National Curriculum. As you stated, so many children have benefited from the improvements brought about by the National Curriculum. I'm sure you can also remember all of the lazy, bone-idle, ineffective, sadistic teachers that populated our classrooms at the time.
As for the Miners' strike....All Scargil's fault. Falklands War:- Well, Galtiari caught me with my knickers down didn't he.Poll Tax:- Yes, I agree, big mistake. My voice:- Do I sound better when I write?
Love and Kisses,
Mags

You know, whenever I reach the depths of despair in teaching.....quite frequently at times, I dream of scenarios where I can get a few weeks off work with full pay.
So far, I can only think of two such eventualities.
1) Appendicitis.
2) Jury duty.

Well, I came home on Saturday and there was a large brown envelope waiting for me.
I GOT THE JURY DUTY !! Thirty years I've waited for that letter and now it's arrived. I wonder what sort of case I'll get?